The Telepaths' Revenge

I am expecting a most interesting news story to take place today. I have advertised it in an email to CNN, and now I am advertising it here.

All I know about it this morning is its title, The Telepaths' Revenge, and that it is an event which will take place in response to America's cruelty to my beloved mother before and after God gave me the gift of audible mental telepathy.

I will note four things for you that should be elements of this news story; first that Telepaths' is intentionally in the plural, that this is the anniversary of my beloved mother's birth, that Jesus Christ was also an audible mental telepath, and that this news story could free me from America's torture-enslavement.

Stay tuned, Dear Reader.